The Br’sqvur ships were very different from the ships people normally see in science function. First off, they weren’t solid, at least for the colony ships. Instead, they consisted of a multi-layered geodesic sphere, constructed out of large tubes through which the Br’sqvur could swim. At each external junction were multiple engines. The computer system controlled all of these engines allowing the sphere to move in pretty much any direction. Towards the interior of the ship, junctions consisted of large pools surrounded by hollow shells. Families resided in these shells, as the Br’sqvur were still air breathing and to an extent land dwelling.

At the center of the ship was a large power core, surrounded by the computer core and other essential systems. This area was also the “bridge,” though not much of one was needed, as each member of the colony was able to interact with the ship through their direct neural interface.

For those who are not familiar with geodesics, below is a two layer geodesic sphere, designed by George W. Hart. The colony ships, depending on their size, likely consisted of far more than two layers.

Also, because of the aquatic nature of much of the ship, there really wasn’t any need for all that much life support. The hull itself was heavily insulated for the most part, so it took minimal energy to heat the environment, and most of the energy for environmental regulation went to artificial light. An artificial biome throughout the ship, produced a large amount of plankton, which fed smaller organisms, and eventually larger ones, allowing for a food source for the Br’sqvur; their ships were essentially miniature words.

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Sq’wak is not a penguin per se. She was a member of a species that we will refer to as the Br’sqvur. Penguins are the result of convergent evolution.

This article describes, in brief, a few points about the species to which Sq’wak belonged. You should read “Penguinism and the Birth of the Universe” and “YHWH’s New Empire” before this article. While this article may never make sense, it will make even less sense without reading those two article first. Or not.

While in many ways the Br’sqvur mirrored Earth penguins, there were some striking differences as well. They were quite large: a little bit larger than modern humans. They also had much larger brains. In fact, they were probably a fair amount smarter than modern humans.

They were a glorious and prosperous species which had, long before the time of Sq’wak, taken to the stars and spread throughout the universe. But this success was no small feat. You see, the Br’sqvur still had the characteristics of their ancient ancestors, and so lacked any form of hands with which they could manipulate their environment. Instead, the Br’sqvur used a combination of an exoskeleton which had prehensile fingers and direct neural interfaces for their technology.

They also still loved to swim, and so their ships had a very odd configuration, at least for their colony ships. Throughout each ship were networks of waterways and the crew would swim from place to place, from deck to deck, rather than taking elevators. This waterway was also used to store a lot of their food.

The colony ships were quite large. Just like Earth penguinoids, the Br’sqvur lived in colonies of upwards of a few million. The largest colony ships could easily handle that many. Some of the members worked on the ship itself. Others engaged in various forms of commerce. There was no real government on the ship. Instead a form of digital contract system managed their commerce and other interactions. And if a group wished to leave, they would just take a small ship and start a new colony.

Given the size of these ships, colony budding wasn’t exactly uncommon, however between the use of their smart contract systems, mutual cooperation through commerce, and strong family ties, it did not occur all that frequently either, and in many cases, it was more due to an increase in their population than anything else. After all, with their technological advancements, a member of their species could easily live for thousands of years.

Final note: Thank you for reading a brief summary of the Br’svqur. More on them will be written in the future, so please follow us on Twitter and Facebook to keep up to date.

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In the year’s following YHWH’s arrival in our universe, as told in “Penguinism and the Birth of the Universe,” YHWH sought to establish his empire. But Sq’wak did everything in her power to prevent his total domination.

Luckily Sq’wak had an unlikely ally, who emerged shortly after YHWH’s emergence in our universe. You see, G’ral, who had been forced to finish the research for YHWH, was taken to our universe to continue working on other projects. YHWH also had become infatuated with G’ral and G’ral used that to his advantage. He eventually manged to sabotage a research project and escape.

After the betrayal by G’ral, YHWH decided to scorn all men. It is actually for this reason that he manipulated the words of the bible to oppose homosexuality. YHWH was jealous and angry at his ex lover. He took Leviticus, which only applied to the Israelites, and really had little to do with prohibiting homosexuality, and worked to change its interpretation, and the interpretation of many other religious ideas, so that people would come to oppose homosexual relationships.

After G’rel’s escape, he worked to help Sq’wak in any way that he could to defeat, or at least protect our universe against, YHWH, including the development of technology that would help the fight against YHWH. He also eventually found that a new species evolved on Earth. The species was very similar to his own. They are the polar bears.

As for YHWH, he worked to create various worlds in his image, within this universe. Of course, his war-like ways generally led to the rapid demise of such worlds. A few empires arose, but most burned shortly after reaching space, and it is for this reason that there are very few signs of intelligent life in the universe. Still, YHWH selected a few from the most promising worlds and constructed an empire. This empire sits in hiding, waiting for those unknowingly fall into their trap…

Further Reading

• Penguinism and the Birth of the Universe

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The following is a description of possible events that led up to the beginning of the current universe. It is a work of fiction. Please do not start a messed up secretive organization where people have to pay tons of money to join.

Universal date 10327A-7892.5: the universe had grown old and the stars were dying, but there were still a handful of thriving species. It had long been realized that even with the end of the universe, something would survive. Scientific investigation had found a sort of nexus point of the multiverse, what we today refer to as the eternal dishwasher, an admittedly poor translation of the original language.

However, TVNM, a warlord who had long cheated death through advanced technology, wished not only for his essence to survive, but for continued life. He kidnapped numerous scientists from the remaining species and forced them to do research on a way to survive through the death of the universe and the birth of the next one.

But one scientist, Sq’wak, feared that TVNM would continue his murderous tyranny in the next universe and while continuing the research, found a way to fight him. She was able to integrate her consciousness with the nexus itself, and in doing so, became able to watch over the multiverse. And though it was a difficult choice, an endless existence and unfathomable responsibility, Sq’wak completed her work, but not before one of the other scientists, G’ral, was forced to complete TVNM’s request and TVNM survived and it was in this new universe that he came to be known as YHWH…

For a more general overview of Penguinist mythology, read “The Basics of Penguinism” and to learn what happened next, read “YHWH’s New Empire.”

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It might not come as a surprise that sushi would be considered a sacred food by Penguinists, but the reason might surprise you.

First, sushi is not raw fish. Sushi refers to the seasoned rice itself. While raw fish is a common ingredient used in sushi, cooked fish and vegetables are also quite common.

Sushi is sacred for a few reasons. Rice itself is a staple food for a large portion of the world. It is also one of the oldest domesticated crops, with rice domestication occurring some 10,000 years ago in Asia. In Japan, an agricultural system known as the “satoyama” method literally creates an artificial biome for rice and food production. A lot of wildlife depends on these artificial biomes for their survival, as they have evolved to utilize them.

Additionally, sushi, like much of what is made in Japan, is about simplicity and execution. Traditional sushi has only one or two ingredients, in addition to the rice. Sushi chefs train for years to make quality sushi.

Another food that is common for Penguinists to eat is onigiri, or rice balls, which is just a ball of rice and one or two ingredients, such as kombu, or sesame seeds, or what we consider to be the favourite of Sq’wak, mentaiko (spicy cod roe).

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This is a brief summary of The First Church of Penguinism’s game plan for the next few years.

• Improve our website by making it better looking and more interactive.
  • For now, we’re using Disqus which allows comments on blog posts.
• Gain members
  • We may begin using a standardized membership system if people are interested.
• Generate some revenue through
  • Merchandise
  • Books and other media
  • Ads, although we would prefer not to go this route, if the other revenue generation methods work well enough, and affiliate links, which are already in use
• Become a B Corp (public benefit corporation)
  • Being a Public Benefit Corporation (B Corp) would allow us to focus on our goal of promoting open science and the cooperation between science and religion, while still acting as a business (Certified B Corporation).
• Start supporting open science organizations and other related organizations, including
  • The Center for Open Science
  • Reform Academia Org
• Crowdfunding
  • If there is enough initial support, we will likely rely on Kickstarter or Indiegogo to fund additional expansion

For more information on Penguinism and The First Church of Penguinism, check out our FAQ on the home page.

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